Here we are in our mid to late 40's, looking ahead at the next 20 years. In all likelihood, whatever comes next will probably be the last big thing we do before we retire. The end is in sight. So how do we want to spend ourselves in the home stretch. What do we want to accomplish with our lives?
These questions are probably worth pondering by all of us (especially those of us who call ourselves Christians). After all, Jesus tells us to deny ourselves, to take up our cross and follow him (Mark 8:34). And then the Apostle Paul said, "I have become all things to all people, that by all means I might save some." (1 Cor. 9:22).
A scant two verses later, he gives us a metaphor to unpack that: life is a race; run it to win (1 Cor 9:24).
Great. I have no problem with this in principle. Emotionally, I put my hand to that plow back when I was 17 years old: I want to make my life count, I want to serve God. I'm down with that. For me, the challenge has never been agreeing with Jesus or Paul or Jesus on this issue. Rather, it's been knowing what on earth that actually looks like in real life.
I've spent the past 20 years running - in the real world, the business world, the academic world, the parenting world, the world of ministry. I've had "success" in all of these areas, but none of it lasts very long, and none of it satisfies you very well. And now we've got to figure out what comes next, because ready or not, here it comes...
So what ARE we trying to do with the rest of our lives? What DO we want to accomplish?
Here's what I know right now...
- I'd like to do something where I can support myself financially - by starting a business that is solid and sustainable, something that can create jobs and be profitable enough to be a blessing to the community in which we dwell. Not that I'm against raising support for ministry - we've done it for 8 years now, and we will probably continue to need financial support for the next several years at least. Paul says it's proper for people in ministry to be paid for their work (1 Cor 9). At the same time, that's a right that Paul himself chooses to forgo, for the sake of ministry. And something I've noticed is that in our increasingly post-Christian age, ministry is increasingly hard to fund these days (especially the incarnational, missional kind). So I think I'd like to do something about that.
- I'd like to do something that is fundamentally creative - I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Looking back over my life, I realize how much creativity seems to be a part of how God has wired me - from songwriting, to painting, to gardening, to food and drink; from writing software to planting churches. I love being creative, thinking outside the box, making something from nothing that can be shared with others. So whatever we do next, I'd really like it to be marked by creativity and craftsmanship and beauty and relationships. And it seems like a business that combines coffee, beer, and community could be a very good fit.
- I'd like to do something that creates social space - over the past 10 years, I've discovered how much I love bringing people together, and how important physical space is to this process. We need places that are public, comfortable, social. Places where people gather to talk, to laugh, to celebrate, to get to know one another. Places that are designed to promote things like music, art, craft, conversation. Places that foster friendships. Places where people are welcome, regardless of their spiritual convictions (or lack thereof). But places that aren't hostile to spirituality either. We need places that are intentional in helping people think about what it means to live more meaningful lives. Good public space is hard to find. I'd like to help create more of it.
- I'd like to do something that acts as a spiritual incubator - I've realized that it's almost impossible for me to separate my spirituality from the rest of my life; I don't think I could turn it off if I tried. For whatever reason, I think God has given me a passion and gifting to help start new churches. So I'd love to create social space that is chock full of people all week long, yet is available for church plants that need a place to worship on Sundays. We need more churches that are culturally embedded in the heart of secular cities. And the cost of good space is one of the biggest challenges church plants face. I'd like to create a spiritual incubator to help do something about that.
- I'd like to do something that lets us plant another church - I don't know if God will give us this or not, and I'm ok with it if he doesn't (in some ways, I feel like barren Sarah in Genesis 18: "After I am worn out and old, shall I have this pleasure?"). But I know that I love to preach, to create music, and to help make worship intelligible and meaningful for people who are seeking the true God. And maybe our calling will just be to get things going so we can hand them off to others. Whatever the case, I want to be free enough that God can use us this way if he sees fit.
- I'd like to do something that creates a financial engine - for mercy in our cities, and for planting more churches. While I'm convinced that God calls every Christian to radical generosity on a personal level, I wonder if he might also want us to apply that to our institutions. What if Christian churches "tithed" to their cities? What if Christian businesses did the same? This is one of the things that excites me about starting a brewery - I think that by Year 5, we can be giving away 30% of our net every year, to fund mercy ministries in our community, to fund church plants in other major cities. We're talking about $250,000 a year (on the low end). What if we could do that for the next 20 years? I think we can with a brewery, and I think it would be worth it to try.
- I'd like to do something that inspires others to live sacrificially - whatever else, I'd like to set an example, to say, "Look what's possible! You can do it too! We're willing to help..." I'd like to be a resource, to support others who want to try and model the extravagant, sacrificial love of God to their communities as well.
- Lastly, I'd really like to do something where I can work together with Marilyn. That may not sound like much, but it's increasingly important to me. I think God designs us to need partners to fulfill our calling. And I think she's the one I'd like to work side by side with the rest of the way...
If we can do these things, I think we could say (with Paul): "We've fought the good fight, we've finished the race, we have kept the faith..." (2 Timothy 4:7). Or to paraphrase: "It's possible. You can do it too!"
That's what we'd like to accomplish with our next 20 years.
At the same time, I hope that at the end of the day people don't look at our life simply in terms of what we've accomplished (or failed to). Rather, I hope that what people would see and remember and be touched by is the Gospel - this crazy idea that God would break into this world, and save us at great cost to himself, out of sheer grace. My hope is that all our striving and labor would render us clear - so that people see through us, to the one who motivates us. To me, that's what true success looks like.
That's what we'd like to accomplish with our next 20 years.
At the same time, I hope that at the end of the day people don't look at our life simply in terms of what we've accomplished (or failed to). Rather, I hope that what people would see and remember and be touched by is the Gospel - this crazy idea that God would break into this world, and save us at great cost to himself, out of sheer grace. My hope is that all our striving and labor would render us clear - so that people see through us, to the one who motivates us. To me, that's what true success looks like.
